Potty Training

This week during a session, Susan, (name changed) was expressing her frustration about a really hard challenge she was facing at work. For a few weeks we have been practicing new language and thought processes to help her reframe her situation into something more manageable. Some days she nailed it, regulating her emotions and staying focused, and not letting her frustration derail her. Other times, not so much.

Her biggest frustration this week wasn't with her situation, but with herself. "I feel like I should be farther along by now."

That's when a funny but fitting image popped in my mind. potty-training. Stay with me.

Most people are familiar with potty-training, whether a puppy or a child, you have some idea of the process. But let me lay it out just to be clear.

Let's use the example of a child:

First they make a big mess and aren't even aware of it.

Then comes awareness - they've made a mess and they don't like it.

Next, they voice frustration but they don't know what to do about it.

Then they are introduced to the potty, but they don't make it every time.

Eventually, they are fully potty-trained and only on a rare occasion is there a re-occurance.

Let's swap out potty-training for any new skill.

A client learning to reframe negative thoughts.

A photographer navigating Adobe Photoshop.

A leader practicing more effective communication.

Af first, you don't .realize the mistakes. Then you start noticing them- which can be uncmfortable, even more so if someone points them out to you. Soon you want to change but you don't have the tools. Slowly, with practice, you imporve...but you still 'miss' sometimes. Over time, the new skill sticks.

And here's the thing, if you're committed to growth, the process starts all over again when you tckle something new. I know, I hear the sigh. But it's also proof of progress-because each cycle means you're expanding what's possible.

Like Susan, it's easy to get stuck in the "I should be farther along" mindset. But growth isn't instant. It's messy. It's repetitive. It's full of small wins and occasional setbacks.

The poing isn't perfection (with me that will never be the point) it's persistence. Each step, even the 'accidents' are evidence that you are moving forward.

So the next time you catch yourself feeling discouraged, remember: you're not failing, your training.

This week, give yourself grace in the process. Notice where you are on your growth journey (and for your sake, I hope you are on a growth journey) celebrate the progress-even if, you're not 'there' yet.

And if you're ready for support in reframing your challenges, restoring your confidence and taking intentional steps forward, I'd love to walk alongside you. (Click her for more info)

Have the very best week! I'll be back next week, 6pm in your inbox.

Much love,