The Discomfort of Doing Things Differently

Alice Ranker
2 days ago
2 min read

Like me, you may find yourself on a journey of personal growth. You’ve been practicing permissions, discovering where boundaries are appropriate and necessary. And then something unexpected happens.

Even before you allow time to experience the new dynamic this permission might create, you feel uneasy. You second-guess yourself. The familiar inner dialogue begins to surface, the same one that brought you here in the first place.

Was that too much?

Did I overstep?

Should I just step back in and fix it?

Growth often sounds quieter than we expect. It doesn’t always feel empowering. Sometimes it just feels uncomfortable.

Eventually, you decide to try something different. After all, what do you have to lose? You can always revert to your old ways.

And so, you pause.

You recognize a moment where you would normally step in and fix something. But this time, you don’t. No one asked for your help. You allow the space to exist without your intervention.

And that’s when the discomfort shows up.

Because you’re doing something unfamiliar.

Because you’re not responding the way you always have.

Because growth often feels uncertain before it feels right.

Any time we start a new practice, it can feel uncomfortable. We don’t like the unfamiliar. But unfamiliar doesn’t always mean wrong. Sometimes it simply means you’re doing something differently.

This is where I found myself spending time exploring. Why was it uncomfortable?

Outside of being a new practice, I realized it was because I didn’t want to be misunderstood. I didn’t want my intentions to be misinterpreted.

After reflection and journaling, I discovered that my fears were really about my lack of control in the situation. And that’s when I chose to stay with the discomfort and the unknown.

There’s no perfect way to do this. Every situation and relationship may require something different. But just because it’s hard doesn’t mean it’s not worth it.

Radical love and acceptance means allowing yourself to grow, even when it feels awkward.

It’s okay to let silence exist. You don’t have to justify or explain yourself. Over time, you may begin to trust your intuition more fully.

As this practice becomes more familiar, you may notice a shift. Your body begins to relax. It no longer feels like you are in fight or flight mode. Instead, there’s a quiet steadiness.

You allow time to reflect instead of finding a reason to retreat.

I know with new practices come new sensations. That doesn’t mean you are doing it wrong. It means you are doing it, you are learning.

Growth isn't always comfortable.

But it often leads to clarity, balance, and peace.