The Holiday Table
- Alice Ranker
- 16 minutes ago
- 3 min read
Ready or not, Christmas is this week! And there are a lot of ways we can show up.
For some, your mind immediately went to your To-Do list, which is extra long this time of year. Others, you felt a sense of excitement and anticipation at all the magic this season brings. And, yet I know there are still many who feel all of this with an added bit of sadness and loss.
You already know that I love this season. It fills me with joy to share my love of all things Christmas with those around me but that joy doesn't exist alone.
This season is wrapped in tradition and nostalgia with the lights, the music, and treasured family recipes. It feels sacred and there is much to love about this time of year.
But even in all the joy, I have moments of sadness and grief. I think I always have and that is one reason that I have felt so deeply about this season. I didn’t have the language to explain, or honestly, to explore, this full range of emotions that I was feeling.
As I continue the practice of mindfulness and acceptance, I am learning how to make space for all of my emotions, that it’s okay for me to allow grief (amd other emotions) a seat at the table. As I hold space for myself, something else may quietly pull up a chair.
This week I was baking some of my favorite holiday treats. (Side note, why do we only bake them around the holidays when we love them so much?) My senses were happily overwhelmed with the smell coming from the oven. The cake batter in the mixing bowl was coming together nicely when Spotify decided, without warning, to play Silent Night by the Temptations…I had to step away before the tears spilled into the batter.
It’s normal for us to feel a range of emotions, especially this time of year. Gratitude can be mixed with sadness, excitement with tenderness and affection, hope can exist with exhaustion. Naming and noticing our emotions is maturity, not weakness. And you don’t have to feel pressured to ‘feel’ any specific thing.
Allow your emotions to coexist. There is no ‘right’ way to experience the holidays.
While I love tradition around this season, I have also found that holding too tight doesn’t allow for the changes that are inevitable. Sometimes, small shifts to the tradition allow breathing room and peace. Times and locations may change due to schedules. Loved ones may not be present for a variety of reasons. And, sometimes even the menu may change.
This season as emotions rise to the surface, pause before responding. Take a moment to recognize what the emotion is and what it’s trying to show or tell you. Take a deep breath and allow the holiday to be what it is, instead of what it ‘should’ be.
Give yourself permission to rest, simplify, or maybe even opt out when needed. Or perhaps, just the opposite, you need to jump in with both feet. Go for it! The point is to honor where you are and who you are. That is radical acceptance.
You don’t need to make peace with everything. Sometimes the most honest thing is to simply be present. This holiday table is big enough for joy, grief, laughter, quiet, longing, and love. You don’t need to rearrange the seating to belong.
Remember this week, joy is not fragile. You don’t have to protect it by denying other emotions. The holidays don’t require emotional perfection. (Perfection is an illusion that leaves you empty and unfulfilled.)
My wish for you is that you have the absolute best holiday. Eat the cookies, drink the eggnog, and by all means watch the beloved movies. Drive around and look at the lights in your pj’s. And if you aren’t familiar with Silent Night by the Temptations, I highly encourage it.
Much love,
Ps. If this season feels tender, or layered, or different than you expected, you’re not alone. One of the reasons I created Bloom with Possibility was to offer a gentle place to land — a space to reflect, to name what’s true, and to honor the season you’re actually in, not the one you feel pressured to perform. Whether this week brings laughter, quiet moments, longing, or all of the above, you’re allowed to move through it with grace. Joy and grief can sit at the same table — and you can still choose to show up with intention, compassion, and hope for what’s ahead.
(Use Coupon Code BLOOM to save 25% at checkout.)