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We all have them.

Writer: Alice RankerAlice Ranker

We all have those people in our lives that suck the life out of us. I know, your mind just went to someone. You saw their face clearly. I have a client that has been dealing with a difficult person. It doesn't matter how logical she is, it falls on deaf ears. Periodically when she needs to correspond with this person she will send me the verbiage before sending it to get feedback. (This is quite common among my clients for some reason.) Anyway, recently when she sent me a text she was preparing to send I asked her what was her desired feedback from the person? In other words, what do you hope to gain? Before she even responded back she realized that nothing she could say would bring her desired outcome. This person was an energy thief. So, she changed their name in the contact info on her phone. Now, any time she thinks to correspond or respond to this person she will be reminded that, for her, they are an energy thief.

I loved this idea!! And I can't take credit for it but you better believe I will be sharing with future clients.

This is one strategy to dealing with those people in our lives that are challenging that we have to maintain some type of connection with. Another strategy that has helped me is creating a mantra. For example, one of my go-to's is: "In the big picture, this doesn't matter." It keeps me from being or even feeling petty. This is for the things that are annoying in the moment but in an hour or tomorrow I won't even think about. This was also helpful to me in a season when I was experiencing growth in myself and establishing a mindset of peace regardless of what was going on externally. That accompanied with the practice of deep breathing I am sure have saved my life. I find it's the really simple things that we avoid because they seem trivial that make such a difference. the last one I'll share today is to remove yourself from the situation. That can be as simple as going outside or even to the restroom. Or, if you are feeling super courageous you can verbalize it.

The point is to do what's best for you. Put those permissions in place. Change the names, say the mantras for goodness sakes, practice the breath.

If you have other ideas or things that work for you please share them with me.

Have the best week available to you.

Much love,






 
 
 

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© 2023 by Alice Ranker

couples coaching - personal growth - life coaching - therapy - self help

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